How Long Does A Cat Hold A Grudge?

Jennifer Wilson
6 min readMar 29, 2022

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Have you ever made a cat angry? If so, you know that it can be hard to win back the kitty’s affection. Sometimes cats will go out of their way to seek revenge on those who have wronged them. It’s not unusual for an angry feline to take out anger on someone by clawing furniture or urinating outside the litter box.

So, how long does a cat hold a grudge? Unfortunately, there is no definitive answer. Some cats may seem to forgive and forget quickly, while others may have a grudge for a very long time.

If you have wronged a cat, the best thing to do is try to make amends as soon as possible. Offer the kitty a treat, extra attention, or a new toy. With time and patience, you may be able to win back your furry friend’s trust.

The Psychology of Feline Grudges

Cats are known for their independent nature, their aloofness, and their seemingly inscrutable behavior. Yet anyone who has lived with a cat for a while knows that they are also capable of holding grudges. A cat may suddenly stop purring or refuse to be petted by a particular person, seemingly out of the blue. But why do cats hold grudges, and what can we do about it? In this article, we will explore the psychology of feline grudges.

What is a Grudge?

Before delving into the psychology of feline grudges, it is helpful to first define what we mean by the term “grudge”. A grudge is typically defined as a persistent feeling of resentment or ill-will towards someone who has wronged us. In the context of cats, a grudge might manifest as a cat who suddenly stops showing affection or who avoids a particular person or situation.

Why Do Cats Hold Grudges?

The reasons why cats hold grudges are not entirely clear, but there are a few theories that might help shed some light on this behavior.

One theory is that cats have a strong sense of territory and hierarchy, and they may hold a grudge against someone who they perceive as a threat to their status. For example, if a new cat is introduced into the household, an existing cat may hold a grudge against the newcomer as they see them as a threat to their position as top cat.

Another theory is that cats have long memories, and they may hold a grudge against someone who has done something to upset them in the past. This could be something as simple as accidentally stepping on their tail, or it could be something more significant, such as a traumatic event like being taken to the vet.

It is also possible that cats hold grudges as a form of self-protection. Cats are naturally cautious creatures, and if they perceive someone or something as a threat, they may avoid it as a way of staying safe.

How Can We Tell If a Cat is Holding a Grudge?

It can be difficult to tell if a cat is holding a grudge, as their behavior can be subtle and hard to interpret. However, there are some signs that may indicate that a cat is upset with someone or something.

One common sign is a sudden change in behavior. For example, a cat who used to be friendly and affectionate towards a particular person may suddenly stop purring or start avoiding them altogether.

Another sign is vocalization. Cats may meow or growl more than usual when they are upset, or they may hiss or swat at someone they are holding a grudge against.

Changes in body language can also be a clue that a cat is upset. They may flatten their ears, puff up their tail, or tuck their body close to the ground as a way of expressing their discomfort.

What Can We Do About Feline Grudges?

If you suspect that your cat is holding a grudge against someone or something, there are a few things you can do to try to improve the situation.

First, try to identify the source of the grudge. Is there a particular person or situation that seems to be upsetting your cat? If so, try to minimize their exposure to that person or situation, or try to make it more positive by associating it with treats or playtime.

Next, make sure that your cat is comfortable and has everything they need. Cats are more likely to hold grudges if they are feeling stressed or anxious, so make sure that they have a quiet, comfortable space to retreat to and that they have access to food, water, and litter.

How to Recognize When Your Cat is Holding a Grudge

Recognizing when your cat is holding a grudge can be difficult, as cats are known for their aloof and independent nature. However, there are some signs that may indicate that your cat is upset with you or someone else. Here are a few things to look out for:

  1. Avoidance: If your cat is avoiding you or someone else, it may be a sign that they are holding a grudge. Cats may hide, retreat to another room, or even refuse to be in the same room as the person they are upset with.
  2. Changes in Body Language: A cat’s body language can give clues to their mood. If your cat’s tail is puffed up, their ears are flattened, or they are crouched down low to the ground, they may be upset or scared.
  3. Vocalizations: Cats may meow, hiss, growl, or make other vocalizations when they are upset. Pay attention to any changes in your cat’s vocalizations, as this may indicate that they are holding a grudge.
  4. Unusual Aggression: If your cat is normally docile but suddenly starts swatting or biting, they may be holding a grudge.
  5. Changes in Appetite or Sleep Habits: Cats may also exhibit changes in their appetite or sleep habits when they are upset. They may refuse to eat or drink, or they may sleep more or less than usual.

If you notice any of these signs, it’s important to try to identify the source of your cat’s upset and work to address it. By paying attention to your cat’s behavior and taking steps to improve their comfort and well-being, you can help to build a stronger bond with your feline friend and avoid any grudges that may arise.

Can Cats Forgive? Debunking the Myth of the Vindictive Feline

For years, cats have been unfairly maligned as being aloof, unaffectionate, and even vindictive. One common myth about cats is that they hold grudges and are unable to forgive, leading to a perception of them as spiteful creatures. But is this really true? Can cats forgive?

The short answer is yes, cats are capable of forgiveness. While it’s true that cats can be sensitive creatures who may hold onto negative experiences, they are also capable of moving on from past hurts and forgiving those who have wronged them. Here are a few reasons why:

  1. Cats Live in the Moment: Unlike humans, who often hold onto grudges and resentments for long periods of time, cats live in the present moment. They are not burdened by the weight of past hurts and are able to move on more easily.
  2. Positive Reinforcement Works: Like all animals, cats respond to positive reinforcement. If you have wronged your cat in some way, apologizing and offering them treats, toys, and affection can go a long way towards rebuilding your relationship.
  3. Cats are Resilient: Cats are adaptable creatures who are able to bounce back from adversity. Even if they have been hurt or upset in the past, they are able to move forward and continue building strong relationships with their human companions.

Of course, this is not to say that cats are always forgiving or that they don’t have their own personalities and preferences. Some cats may be more forgiving than others, and it’s important to take the time to understand your cat’s individual needs and preferences.

At the end of the day, cats are complex creatures with their own unique personalities and behaviors. While they may sometimes seem aloof or even vindictive, the truth is that they are capable of forgiveness and are just as deserving of our love and respect as any other animal. By treating our feline friends with kindness and compassion, we can build strong and rewarding relationships that will last a lifetime.

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